In this episode, Greggo sits down with his star-studded sister Tasha Fierse Kennedy and the two talk about old Stonewall days, dance addiction, and crazy adventures that only Kennedy siblings could have.
We also went on down to the river and shot some beautiful editorial photos for the podcast because why dafuq not, my sister is beautiful and I thought y’all deserved to watch her EAT THAT. Click on an image and it should blow up larger 😀😀
It’s been a couple of years since I’ve conducted my own photoshoot, but getting back into the groove with my sis was amazing!
I’m gonna keep a lot of the narrative stuff short on this post, since it’s mostly intended to show these pictures but I might add more to it eventually. Either way I hope you guys enjoy our conversation and send some love our way!
In this episode, Greggo covers what the hell happened last year that created a year-long depression-fueled hiatus for the show, stans Christine and The Queens, gets hella str8 about Formula 1- then reverse Uno’s a gay old time with a “Baketopia” push, the podcast gets its first ad…..sort of.
The Depressing Stuff
Last year, after APD wrongly shot and injured Justin Howell, I had a pretty rough time acclimating to the “new normal” of people being genuinely terrible. Between the pandemic and the toxic discourse surrounding police accountability, I decided that being a hermit was probably the best thing I could do for my mental health…with mixed results. Though I haven’t come to a conclusive answer on how to get over this dissapointment, my spirits have been randomly brought back to life with spring sunshine and the thought of flowers coming back.
Chrisitine and The Queens Standom
Thirteen minutes of cinematic and choreographic beauty tbh, please surrender yourself to the standom.
Christine and The Queens instantly became the French obsession I never knew I neeeded…until I knew I needed it. Hope you guys enjoy it too because their art is BONKERS.
Formula…What?
That’s right bitch, this gay fell in love with the vroom vroom show, F1: Drive to Survive on Netflix. Honestly the luxury and beauty of world renowned brands like Mercedes Ferrari and even Redbull is an incredible popculture moment and I’m here as fuck for seeing an energy drink company unseat legacies at racing around a track, it’s just the kind of chaos that I’m intrigued to see. Not to mention the occasional crash and office politics/musical chairs world of racing is a really interesting phenomenon to bear witness to. It also helps that just one look at Carlos Sainz was enough to draw me in and keep me there.
Carlos Sainz Jr, current driver for Ferrari…..need I say more???
Baketopia (Yum)
Literally can’t wait to discuss this soon
As if my current sugar rush from chocolate raspberry cheesecake wasn’t enough, Baketopia on HBO Max has brought another cute addition to competitive baking. I’m throwing this out here for a future discussion so WATCH THE DAMN EPISODE IT’S FREE- plus you’ll need to study how to make some bomb ass cakes because if the pandemic has taught us anything, it’s that we severely underestimated our ability to learn cool new shit in the panini.
Show Updates
We raised $633.32 from the production fundraiser in January, and it’s already led to some cool shit for me to use for the podcast (more reveals to come bbys)
New episodes are going to POSSIBLY come out every wednesday/thursday or possible free day that I’m off in a given week
I love you guys and am so thankful that any of you give a fuck about visiting this hoe or checking any of this out, literally warms my heart
Don’t forget to checkout the show links for more info on our social shit (our insta numbers are GARBAGE right now) WATCH BAKETOPIA SO YOU DON’T FEEL LEFT OUT, and let me know if you get into Christine and the Queens or Formula One.
In this episode, I sit down with one of my favorite creative geniuses/sources of inspiration and discuss why Hentaii’s title of “Austin’s Next Drag Superstar” just didn’t work out.
We also discuss what truly motivates an artist in an existential environment, their newest EP “Modern Phenomenon” (which is totally out now btw) and what projects + events they’re looking forward to this year.
As always you can listen to the full interview below in the web player or listen to the episode on your favorite podcast app. *
Damn they made this box big af
*Editor’s Note** Hentaii, so far as I know, doesn’t Identify as trans, but in that correlation, is referred to as “they” throughout the interview. It’s also worth noting that the interview below is a condensed, rough paraphrasing, NOT a transcript. The full interview contains everything you’re missing.
It’s a particularly blue day as we unload the excessive amount of equipment that I insisted on bringing for this interview.
As I grab a giant box containing a new photography light that hasn’t ever been opened or assembled, I catch a glance at my subject’s eyes and see a face that’s familiar, but markedly different from how I normally imagine them.
Back before Hentaii was Hentaii, they were David- a hilarious juxtaposition to the eccentric nickname self-dubbed by the ex-drag queen. Before they snatched the heart and the crown of Austin’s drag scene, and before they ever became a drag sibling of mine, we had both swiped right on Tinder and made sushi plans that never came to fruition, an equally eccentric factoid that neither of us has acknowledged for whatever reason since their return from Japan in 2017, not that it matters now (we’re both happily partnered for years).
Pre-hentaii, hentaii.
In that profile picture from wayback when, they looked like the lead singer of a Nickelodeon rock band, and now they looks a little bit like a European dog sitter, albeit a very fashionable one.
We begin making our way to Hentaii’s apartment and as we step in, I’m immediately impressed by the size and space of it. Their outside balcony seems to be the only natural light source throughout their vast living room, and it’s surrounded by gorgeous palm trees.
Looking down from the balcony, it’s a very relaxing sight- one can easily imagine the shelter of the palms providing perfect acoustics for the rain’s inevitable fall. All in all the apartment seems like every artist’s dream.
We settle my giant box of equipment down and move to the bedroom where the smaller space provides more reliable recording acoustics, dodging the dogs Lemmy and Gotham along the way. Just as my interview with Louisianna Purchase started, we christen the beginning of our interview over a bowl of ganja and make small talk of general weed experiences (which you can hear in the full episode).
As Hentaii messes around with their grinder, I spot a large pink bear on the corner of their bed that makes me smile as I think about the dichotomy between the hot pink sensitivity of the bear and some of the haunting iconography of their past drag aesthetics. As I near the end of my daydream, I think about the interesting trajectory of their entertainment career so far, and how our fortunes have come full circle into this moment.
An impromptu photoshoot in Hentaii’s apartment. ft. their big pink bear
In recent years a number of superstars have emerged as nightlife staples in Austin’s Drag scene. Most of the time these personalities are pictured as corpulent, (either naturally so or emboldened by a padded exoskeleton), commanding queens with a microphone- typically hurling playful obscenities as a crowd of bachelorettes lose their shit, and yass-kweening gays croon over their dollar bills.
Hentaii never really got around into fitting that mould. As a matter of fact, it’s hard to think of a mould they do fit into. Similar to our last guest Louisianna Purchase, you’d think based off of some of their past looks that Satan himself had a hand in crafting some of Hentaii’s illusions, and for a handful of them- you might be right.
During our previous weed-talk banter I explain that my pipe (which I may or may not have referral links to in the future) is easily cleaned with coconut oil….which encourages Hentaii to lead me to their bathroom. “I keep it in an urn,” they say with their own unique version of a chuckle, “I thought how cool would it be to have my coconut oil in a place that held someone’s remains?? If there is a ghost in there, it’s a well moisturized one. ” they say grinning. Truly fucking metal.
But to pigeonhole Hentaii as a “spooky queen” would be to underplay the versatility and commitment to the ethereal that their style evokes. Every performance is a unique experience- a snapshot of a moment in time in another universe, untraceable in many ways to one single source of inspiration.
“I’m really into transhumanism, things of that nature, and that’s a theme that shows up in this new EP too.”
– Hentaii on the themes that inspired Modern Phenomenon.
I’ve known Hentaii since they first started performing onstage in my old dancing grounds of Stonewall Warehouse in San Marcos, Texas. The first performance I ever saw from them was a number where they took off a ski mask and revealed a wicked wig underneath. From that very second, I was hooked. For a period of time, Hentaii was the only performer that could encourage me to get out of the house even when I was socially and mentally exhausted.
Hentaii and I at my 22nd birthday party. The fact that they came through meant the world to me (and still does) Since then I’ve performed at their birthday party too, Hopefully we can keep up the tradition whenever possible.
Part of Hentaii’s appeal to me has always been the surrealist and futuristic nature of their performances. In many ways, their drag seemed to be a protest of what modern drag queens were “supposed” to be, and I became addicted to the multiverses that their performances exposed me to. Having the chance to see them rebel as their authentic self was always inspirational, especially as they began to make their way to the austin circuit. Later on they’d beat out twelve or thirteen other competitors and claim the crown as Austin’s Next Drag Superstar, only to quit drag two years later and pursue a growing commitment to their music projects under the name Vestite.
Before I begin my questions, I prepare Hentaii for my excitement. We’re drag siblings through our iconic mother Chitah Daniels Kennedy, and although we’ve known each other for quite a while and have hung out at our drag family gatherings, we’ve never functioned outside of a group setting, and secretly I feel a little nervous that they’ll regret letting this excitable extrovert into their apartment.
Thankfully, they haven’t.
G: Does this happen to you a lot where people just grab you and tell you how fucking inspirational you are?
H: No, not a lot but I was just talking to my friends about this the other day, we were at the grocery store and we saw another musician in Austin who we all know – and I’ve met her multiple times but always in full face- it was back when I used to do full drag, but I know that feeling of when someone comes up and says hi and brings attention to you by telling you how great you are, like in that moment…I want to die, but then after it’s very reaffirming but when it’s like in that moment I’m just like erghhhh I don’t know what to say!”
G: Well that and then it’s kind of like-well at least they acknowledged you outside of it! ‘Cause that’s a big deal too! I feel like sometimes whenever you’re surrounded by an artistic community…it is kind of a bigger deal to get acknowledged outside of that moment or environment, and not that as an artist you *should* always be seeking the validation of others, but it’s a natural thing to be attune to that…so I can kind of see how that could be triggering too.
H: It feels good to be reaffirmed or told “yeah I like what you do” …In the moment of receiving those compliments though I don’t know what to do, like I don’t know how to absorb or register them, but what I’ve learned is that you just say thank you and be very nice and later you can reflect on it and be like ‘Wow they really liked it.”
I will say however, those kinds of compliments too can also be -in my experience as a performer- very negative too, because in my mind if I just got done with a bad performance and I don’t feel good about it and am having an existential crisis like ‘what the fuck am I doing, why am I doing this?’ This happened a lot with drag, not so much with music and someone comes up and talks about how much they LOVE the performance that I just did and that I hated then I’m like what the fuck am I doing? If people just like ANYTHING then why even put in the effort?
From the infamous bathroom of Stonewall Warehouse to the sticky stage of just about every LGBTQ+ club in Austin.
G: So for those who don’t know you from Austin, you got started in San Marcos under Stonewall Warehouse when it just started with Chitah and everything- can you talk about how you went from that to eventually getting into Austin?
H: Yeah, when I came back to San Marcos for my senior year in college I had returned from studying abroad in Tokyo. While I was there I was really interested in the fashion scene there and had a lot of interesting and bizarre clothes I had gathered, but had nowhere to wear them- and San Marcos is very conservative compared to an international city like Tokyo; and I ran into my friend Tyler George who performed under the name Tara Bull at the time, we were in his car and I found a pair of stockings and was like ‘what are these?’ and she was like ‘I’m doing drag now, there’s a gay bar here called Stonewall’
Early drag days w/ Hentaii and River Rains
So I started performing there, and actually the first time I went to Stonewall I was in drag, and I didn’t have eyelashes on and I didn’t have a drag name, but I was living my fish fantasy, and I met River Rains that day who is to this day one of my best friends, and I met Bambi and Ruby that day, it was a very fateful day.
G: So how did your relationship with Ruby come about?
H: I met Ruby that first night I went to Stonewall and we were acquaintances up until I was in drag survivor and they had a theme one week where you had to partner with someone who had done it in the past, and so I got Ruby to be in my duet and then we hung out to prepare for it, the challenge actually went really well. We started doing more duets together and finally decided to start doing our own show after Sub.Rosa – the first show I did in Austin- was temporarily put on hold. We brainstormed and came up with other ideas and worked together on things more.
Now we’re doing completely different things but there might be some stuff that we have planned to do in the future but…no details on that yet.
G: That would be cool! Ruby is interesting to me in an elusive kind of way- just because I haven’t talked to her very much.
H: She’s a very elusive person…very down to earth- a lot of people think she might be kind of a bitch because she’s hot, quiet and dressed to the 9’s or the 10’s or whatever but she, like myself is an introvert but when she drinks… and we all drink, I’m not saying she drinks a lot or that she’s an alcoholic or anything *laughs* but-
G: *laughing* She is gonna light you up!
H: No! But like really when she drinks… some people get louder when they drink but Ruby gets quieter, and at drag events she’s pretty quiet….
G: *Jokingly* Because she’s lit!
H: No! Not because she’s lit but because she’s just very observant and introverted, she’s watching what’s going on and she’s a little introverted so maybe she doesn’t talk to anyone and everyone who’s there.
G: Another thing that I’ve gathered about Ruby just from the work that you’ve both done on Violent Fem alone is that she’s very capable of conceptual stuff.
H: Yeah there was this photoshoot we did where we were connected together by an umbilical cord and people were messaging me telling me how much they loved it and I was like ‘oh no, this one was actually all completely Ruby’ and it looks like something that would come from my mind because I’m very into science fiction and like-
H: Yeah, weird shit! and just like very disturbing, provacative stuff. It’s funny how people would assume certain things just because of how polished she looks that she might not be able to get into the weird and the creepy and conceptual. And conceptually for Violent Fem- we always took turns creating concepts. One month it was mine and the next month it was hers, so if you look back at those you’ll see it.
And honestly, for the first violent fem, we were getting so ripped off financially, we got a really bad deal from the bar that we threw it at and it’s been fixed, the person ripping us off no longer works there, but we were so discouraged that we weren’t going to do anything like a photoshoot or videos to promote for the second one- but Ruby and her friend were like “Let’s just do, it let’s do something.” and it was really campy it was the housewives one that sticks out like a sore thumb, but I’m really glad we did it.
H: Whenever I started at Stonewall, I already knew how to do makeup and was posting stuff online- it was one of those internet thing- I had a voice and I knew how I wanted to do my face and stuff, but I didn’t have anybody with more experience than me that could give me some guidance, and that’s what Chitah has been since I met her. One thing about the gay community now is that we’re very segregated by age and that’s not great because it didn’t used to be like that. It’s important to interact with people who are older than you, more experienced than you and wiser than you to tell you how it is- because our parents can’t do that, and our peers are just as lost as we are. So there needs to be someone for example who can tell you that you can take a break from drag because in ten years, people are still gonna be doing it.
So I think in terms of her impact on me, A) I wouldn’t be here without her and B) imparting experience and passing it along…I couldn’t have gotten it from anyone else.
G: And how ridiculous is she?
H: I was just thinking about this because the first time I met you, you were performing and you had this little vest on and you were dancing on stage and I was like ‘Who’s he? He’s cute’ and as soon as you got offstage, she was like “Hey Greg, Hentaii wants to suck your dick!” I was like ‘ohhh’…I learned something about Chitah that night.
G: *cracking up* That was so funny ’cause after I heard that I I remember thinking, ‘Did I hallucinate that?’
H: Nope, that was all Chitah…I think I just waved or something. *laughs*
G: Well, I was just like “Oh my god, Hentaii knows who I am, yay!”
H: Nooo, at that time I wasn’t anything, like at that time-
G: I’m telling you, I was hooked on day one, your very first performance that I saw with the ski mask…
H: I think it was Mr.President by Kylie Minogue but it was slowed down…that was something that I liked doing, especially in the beginning-
Was it the time when the music stopped? Because that was traumatic….
G: *laughs* I don’t know… I-
H: This number is me in a ski mask in a trench coat and I come out to Mr.President by Kylie Minogue slowed down and then I take off the trench coat and I’m like naked underneath it except I have something covering my no-no parts. And the first time I did it- I guess the file I sent was corrupted or something and so right whenever I take it off- the beat drops and I like rip off the trench coat, the music just stops and I’m just like standing there….there’s a video of it somewhere, I don’t think it exists anymore.
G: *cackling wildly* You think your lawyers took care of it?
H: I HOPE SO. You see my body posture just kind of change from like confident to…like ‘oh no…’ ’cause you have that moment of silence where like everybody is engrossed in watching and then suddenly it’s silent and you can hear shuffling and like the movement of lips. So I ran offstage and was like “What’s wrong?!?” ‘Cause I’m a fucking diva, I was pissed. and they were like ‘somethings wrong with the file, it says it’s playing but there’s no music coming out’ So I was like ‘Just play Toxic by Britney Spears!!’ So they just played that and I performed as best as I could.
I will tell you, since then I’ve only had about one major musical malfunction…so you learn, you grow from it, but my god talk about trauma….”
G: *Damn near tears laughing* “I can totally see the part where you said your posture shifted…”
H: Yeaah! I was like very confident and then suddenly it was kind of like you shrink in and you’re like ‘Oh no, where am I? Why am I naked and there’s people looking at me?’
“Why am I naked and everyone is staring at me…?” Photo via Hentaii’s instagram, taken by Harrison Rabbits
G: It’s like coming out of a hypnotism….
H: Yes! It’s like an abrupt return to reality! Like suddenly Kylie Minogue is gone and all you’ve got is the sound of shifting weight in the crowd…
Hentaii’s winning performance at Drag Survivor, eventually I’ll upload the infamous Spike Baby Performance
G: Some people in the Austin drag scene may know you as the queen who won “Austin’s Next Drag Superstar” and quit drag two years later…so my immediate follow up question is…Who the fuck do you think you are making all this music?
H: *laughs* I took someone else’s opportunity to shine and then was like ‘see ya!’
No, but towards the end of doing drag- I really started to resent it, because I was working two jobs, was super duper busy, but still trying to make the drag thing happen and my heart wasn’t in it. So like, a lot of the performances- particularly at the end- I’m not necessarily proud of. It was like you get off work at like ten and the call time is 10:30 it’s like okay I’m gonna put a mask on and glue a bunch of shit to my face but people would still come up afterwards and LOVE IT and nothing had changed.
So it’s like if I’m not really extending myself or doing what the art that I wanna do and getting the same response, maybe I should do what I wanna do…so that’s what led into it- I’m just…doing what I wanna do.
G: That’s really bad ass! I knew you were kind of over it towards the end for a while, but that’s really awesome. The reason why I was so particularly drawn to your drag is because when I see you on stage looking so phenomenal, with different looks and meanings… I know for you it might not have been great because your heart wasn’t 100% in it- but for me as a member of the audience…just seeing the conglomerate of different experiences is just so overwhelming to the creative mind, your inspiration transcends mediums.
H: That’s what I aimed to do, so thank you for that. I always considered drag to be a combination of the things I was good at like writing, and directing (I did directing in college) and putting it into a performance medium. A lot of my drag performances are open-ended and I’ve kept up those ideas that nothing is objective, everything is open for interpretation and have translated it into my music as well- my partner Sam HATES it because after a show or performance he’ll ask me “what was that performance about?” and I’ll say “I dunno what do you think?” because to me, answering that kind of ruins the fun of it for me.
G: So when did you start getting into music? Did I hear you say earlier that you always wanted to do music?
H: I always did music actually, high school into college I used a number of different programs, and so I was always making music- it’s still there, it’s on soundcloud- but it was never something I really thought about like “hey I could really do this.” And then I started to feel bored with drag, went through some tumultuous life period stuff- so originally I released my first single, Magnetic as Hentaii, I didn’t have Vestite or a name for the project – it was just an extension of the drag, which now looking back was a good idea- It helped me bring some of the following from drag into music. I made the demo on my bed from my old one bedroom apartment on my laptop- I hardly even had any hardware to make it.
Hentaii’s first single, Magnetic, featured a really insane music video. You can hear some of the story on the “nightmare of an experience” that shooting was in the full episode. Photo by: Elissa Shopoff
Looking back on the demos, it’s crazy how much my production has improved since then, but I got together with a friend, Joe Stacey, who’s a producer and eventually I sent him some demos and he helped me produce that song and a couple of others from my EP but it wasn’t like I just handed him the songs and said “make something with it”- I was in the room with him for mostly everything and I watched everything he did and asked questions when I could while he was around to absorb as much as I could. The song Mind Slave on the EP is actually my first song doing everything myself.
Hentaii’s first EP – Dark Signal – was their first foray into released musical projects. “Dark Signal was more about looking towards the future and Modern Phenomenon is kind of looking at the past.”
The newest EP actually, is all me as well. Cheer captain is the first single, and there’s three other songs, and I did everything, there’s no input from other producers or anything, and it’s really hard; I’m not as knowledgeable as Joe so when I have questions on how to do something I have to watch an hour long Youtube video, but it’s really rewarding.
I’m really proud of how it sounds, listening to them through the first demos vs the final products I’m like ‘wow this is really clear’ and it sounds like you’ve pulled it out of the abyss- and I’m really happy with it.
Cheer Captain- Our “Song Of The Week” …every week
Definitely recommend streaming on Apple/Spotify for quality purposes but add it to a playlist!
G: What came with the names Vestite and Hentaii? It sounded like earlier you said your relationship with Hentaii is still kind of going…
H: Yeah, I’m still going to be doing some performances this year. My boyfriend Sam is doing a benefit for his top surgery so I’ll be in drag for that, just because all the other performances are drag and it’d feel kind of weird not too….and also I do miss it, I just don’t want to go back to how I was doing it before, but Hentaii will always be my name for as long as I live in Austin, Texas.
The name Vestite came from a list of names that I made for what I wanted to call the project- I realized I wanted to separate it from drag because I felt like there are certain expectations that come from doing music as a drag artist, because there’s an emphasis on the appearance and visual side of it and while I love visuals and all of that, I wanted to focus on the music.
Originally I wanted it to have some sort of connection to Hentaii, and I came up with the name Hentaii as a joke because I didn’t want a drag name but Chitah made me pick one so I decided I wanted something equally funny to my Japanese and American friends. So originally I wanted to call the project “ANIME PORN” but then I decided that that’s not me anymore. I didn’t want to attract that kind of fan either, I don’t make anime-specific music and I know that a lot of parts of my drag have been compared to anime and Japanese fashion- but that wasn’t ever my main inspiration. The japanese connotation is different than what we think in the states too though, in Japan, the usage of the word Hentaii is more widely used to describe weird, queer, pervert, or a freak.
G: So what are you looking forward to in regards to your music and how everything goes from here?
H: I’m really looking forward to making music with more hardware and less software, because I really enjoy being able to touch and turn knobs rather than sliding on the trackpad, it’s a lot more expressive and I can groove- there’s just so many ideas that you can get with it. For the next EP I wanna do a lot more hardware and recording more with the instruments themselves.
On this topic, Hentaii also lists a host of other shows and events- most of which have since been cancelled due to Coronavirus- but one that didn’t was their February 29th EP release party with cohosts Bitchtopher and Brujaux – where they performed all of the songs from the EP as well as some funky covers.
Unbeknownst to both of us at the time of this interview, Hentaii would eventually ask for backup dancers on Facebook and I was more than happy to oblige.
Hentaii, Claire and I at BITCHCRAFT’s and Vestite’s EP release party | 2.29.2020
At one point during our conversation, we both begin discussing our relative retreats from the social scene and our resurgence back in as our careers and hobbies have created the need for us to re-enter. As I confess my newfound relish of introversion, Hentaii offers a unique perspective that speaks to the heart of the existential and intangible:
H: The one thing I will say of being in an artistic community -especially the drag community- is that everybody is living this fantasy of being this sexy, hot superstar that they are, and the difference between my bar friends and my close friends are my close friends are the people who can turn it off.
Because you can’t always be that character, you can’t always believe that you’re the best thing on the earth and that you’re this superstar, and there are some people who straight up can’t turn it off, they’re always in character or ‘turned on’.
So going out, you’re kind of surrounded by people who are all turned on and they’re all living their fantasy which can be this kind of like euphoric thing or it can be-
G: -Like you’re surrounded by creative ‘Yes’ men…
“The world is on fire and we’re dressing up as women and dancing.” Hentaii via instagram.
H: Yeah creative ‘Yes’ men or creative narcissists- and to be fair I think all creatives and artists have that element of themselves, I mean it’s a self-indulgent thing, the world is on fire and we’re dressing up as women and dancing- but it’s the ability to be self-aware and switch it off when you need to that makes someone a close friend that you can sit down and chat with.. that makes them more than a ‘drag friend’
I’m not sure if it’s the dispassionate delivery of the statement or if it’s just the jarring nature of the hearing this confession aloud, but immediately I begin to wonder- am I guilty of this?
After our interview I begin to chew the question over more…. is that what’s stopped me and Hentaii from hanging out outside of those family outings? Did they think I was always ‘on’ ?
Sure I’m usually pretty excitable by nature, but I always thought I made it clear to my peers that I’ve always valued meaningful connections over being “the life of the party..”
https://www.instagram.com/p/B9HuJQqpIWM/
The last line of this is key
It then dawns on me that if Hentaii believed that to be the case, they probably would have never invited me over, let alone allowed me to take up three or so hours of their time with an interview. As I debate back and forth on this insecurity, I reminisce on the scenes that we’ve shared in those group settings- mostly at the clubs that are now closed or barred from operating to the public due to coronavirus. Brief stares from across the room or single moments of acknowledgement. In a way, those nods said it all.
There’s a nature in us both that lifts up through the fumes of the party and looks at it from the ceiling-down in a lot of ways. While we both may live in our minds about where or when the next time or opportunity comes for pushing our creative boundaries, we also recognize that the world is on fire, and that our art is nothing more than a vision to distract (or emphasize) the flames burning all around us.
The design from Hentaii’s latest batch of Modern Phenomenon T-shirts, many sizes are still available since quarantine has stopped them from going out and selling most. Dm them on Instagram for details.
Bonus Material
As mentioned previously, the interview above is a summarization of some points of our conversation w/ Hentaii, the following bonus material is also contextualized by listening to bothEpisode #5 and the Spray Paint Q & A Bonus material.
As an added bonus for actually checking out the website, enjoy this clip of Hentaii roasting a bunch of Queens including our guest from episode #3, Louisianna Purchase. It’s too fucking hilarious.
In this episode, I discuss why I’m taking a week to fuck off of social media and socializing. I also address some of the backlash that I got from Episode #4 and how it is reminiscent of past scuffles with insecure drag artists who contaminate the scenes that they’re in through needless shadiness.
As always, you can find this episode in the webplayer below, along with all other relevant show links over at linktr.ee/greggonewild/
since the quarantine orders have hit and even before that, both the politics of our situation combined with an equal amount of lunacy and irresponsibility in the social media sphere have exhausted me to the point where I’ve become actively cynical of the future – and that’s not healthy.
The downright dumb and reckless actions done by this administration and its surrogates teeters between willful ignorance and downright criminal negligence.
When Trump closed White House offices on Pandemic responses, he dealt a blow to our disease readiness.
We’ve known since November that a deadly virus was spreading in China and that the Chinese government has a less than transparent way of handling sensitive news and information that challenges their global reputation. The whistle blower who attempted to alert the world about the virus was jailed and eventually died from the virus, while another whistle blower remains missing. and in January- U.S. Senators were receiving private briefings and selling off stock based off of classified information about the potential effects that the virus could have on the U.S. population (and by extension, the consequences that it could have on U.S. financial markets).
The first confirmed case of Corona virus hit the U.S. on January 21st, 2020 Officials knew about the virus’ contagiousness since November and were receiving briefings about the virus., while Fox News didn’t give it any accurate coverage until mid-March
Seeing how conservative media conglomerates and institutions like FOX News willfully put populations at harm; knowing that the president is a habitual liar, and then on that very same note seeing people defend the president, DESPITE all evidence of congressional corruption in this time is very telling about the lack of class solidarity that we have as a country, and the power that these institutions have in crafting consequential societal narratives.
The fact that there are still people meeting in hordes to go to church despite the fact that such gatherings have lead to deaths and hospitalizations elevates this fever dream of stupidity into a dangerous and deadly reality for the public at large.
Missouri is one of those states that exempt church services from its stay-at-home order. This is a mistake. pic.twitter.com/PAU8zwJ980
By far one of the most frustrating videos I’ve seen during this whole fucking thing.
The blame doesn’t end at republicans and Fox news though, Joe Biden’s campaign and the chair of the Democratic National Committee, Tom Perez did nothing to discourage the Florida, Arizona and Illinois democratic primaries from continuing forward, and Joe Biden’s campaign actually pushed to keep the primary dates and planned on more “party unity” attacks for Bernie if things didn’t pan out how they wanted. (In the podcast I mentioned Ohio, but it’s discussed in this video that the decision to delay was shot down by the court but was eventually delayed again by the governor) Biden had remained mostly absent in action– while Bernie Sanders made no mention to urge voters to risk their health by going out in public in the midst of a pandemic and had been doing nonstop live streams and policy pushes to help relieve and inform the american working class.
"We respect what they're doing."
DNC Chair Tom Perez says states have systems in place to move forward with Tuesday's primaries, after judge denies Ohio governor's request to postpone the elections amid the coronavirus pandemic. pic.twitter.com/u4uotIGrdO
Tom Perez enables the spread of the coronavirus among the most vulnerable populations and takes a shocking anti-science and anti-responsibility approach to primary voting in states that refused to postpone primaries.
In any other situation, frustrated people like myself would naturally protest or gather at public institutions demanding responsibility or organizing in person to coordinate political consequences and opposition for the president and his ilk, as well as DNC officials who put people at risk by continuing to push for pandemic primary voting during election season and even after the election is over- but this virus discourages that type of organizing, and others like me don’t have the luxury of being stupid beyond all reason to ignore the empirical evidence suggesting all the reasons why that would be a bad idea.
So what then are we left to do? What outlets do we have? Well social media is there, sure, but at this point the types of discussion through these channels have become tainted with even more misinformation, more cognitive dissonance and more toxic discourse than the television.
In many ways, it exemplifies the confusion and misplaced anger, as well as the lethargy for accountability that lead to the perfect culmination of this deadly pandemic.
So I’ll be taking a break from all of it. Both online and offline- because when it comes to airing out grievances regarding the spectacular lack of accountability, we’re already shouting in the void; and at this point, I think it’s more cruel to the void to remove your voice from the equation. Silence has now become my preferred method of protest.
On another note, the unproductive insults leveled at me through petty comments and characterizations of perceived cuntyness by members of the house of Lepore from episode #4 has only elevated my social exhaustion.
Shayla Shimmy, daughter in the House of Lepore going full shade for no fucking reason. Super classy.
In Episode 4, I recalled calling Girl 6 ahead of the episode’s recording and release to let her know that I’d be bringing up our unfriendly meeting two years ago, and revealing some of my anxious thoughts following the touching disqualification from Magical Realness.
While the call remained friendly for the most part, there was a bit of “fierce defensiveness” when I mentioned how she had touched her competitor at my ball. She denied ever doing so and raised her voice at me while reminding me that she’s “the gatekeeper” of balls in Texas. This is despite the fact that there’s video proof of her grabbing the boots of her competitor and sitting on her as I grabbed results from my judges.
Two days later after our call, I noticed I had been unfriended and blocked on different social media sites by her before the episode even aired.
As if that weren’t telling enough about how deliberately misconstrued my comments on the podcast were, I also got a good series of tweets hurled my way by her and other members of the house of lepore accusing me of disrespecting the house and mischaracterizing my intentions on the whole episode.
Literally so much wrong with this chain of tweets, lmao. For the record, I’m a healing crystal gay.
Nowhere in Episode 4 did I say anything that wasn’t true about how I felt immediately following my elimination or how things unfolded regarding my past experience with mother lepore, I mentioned everything that I discussed in my episode in the phone call with her, including how she touched her competitor at my ball a couple of years ago, and I also insisted time and time again both in the call and in the episode that a lot of the thoughts that initially ran through my head were born out of anxiety, and that I gave no credit to them.
Seeing the needless backlash and the caustic nature of the attacks hurled at me on Twitter though, begin to make me think that maybe those anxious thoughts were actually misplaced instincts.
“You will be doing yourself a big favor” Interesting.
If you’re so sensitive to perceivednotions of criticism – so much so that you’d allow or enable members of your own house to attack someone on your behalf and delete your own false tweets about the person you’re attacking, then it’s obvious that grandeur is what you’re shooting for, not an honest conversation, not “community”, but grandeur.
Either way, I’ll continue doing my thing and highlighting artists that I love and that I find worthy of praise, and while I initially mentioned the house of Lepore as a way to spotlight their contributions to the ball scene and the larger LGBTQ+ space of Austin, I refuse to highlight people that show me that their rhetoric of community spirit pales in comparison to their inherent need to be shady for no fucking reason. So consider this their last mention on the show. The nightlife scene is a brief blip in time in comparison to the rest of our lives that we have, and if they’d rather spend this time being complete asshats for no reason, then they will get zero mention from this podcast going forward because people like that don’t deserve any attention, hopefully others in the scene will take notice and allow these faux-legends to snuff themselves out via their shitty attitudes.
On a brighter note- I’m really looking forward to my silent retreat. I’ll be focusing on exercising, doing yoga, and reading the library of books that’ve been waiting for me, as well as meditating and hiking. It’ll be really awesome to connect back with my physical and mental spaces that I had prior to the gym closures. I miss the rhythm of peace that I had set up for myself pre-quarantine.
Hope everyone is finding their own paths to peace of mind during this quarantine, remember that your worth is beyond what you measure in western standards of “productivity” Love y’all very much. 💞✨
Check out the Facebook page while I’m gone for memery, I’ve set up some scheduled posts in the meantime.
In this episode, Greggo covers Queer Camp Out in San Marcos, Magical Realness in Austin, the San Antonio/Austin Bernie Sanders Rallies, + the confusing nature of truth in the age of anxiety and information.
We also announce next week’s guest, review this week’s Meme of The Week, Netflix’s Next in Fashion and award a very 80’s melancholy pop-bop by Vestite the crown as our Song of The Week!
As always the full audio version of this episode is available below or on your favorite streaming apps. Be sure to check out Vestite’s latest EP Modern Phenomenon as well- it just came out and it BANGZ.
Queer Camp Out
Queer Camp Out hosted by Queer Theater Texas (brainchild ofDerek Thomas Miller) was fucking awesome- it consisted of a very gay and very diverse queer variety show featuring stand-up comedy, storytelling via interpretative dance, a fashion show, drag performances and a fashion + dance competition mini-ball hosted by my drag sister Miss Stonewall Warehouse 2017-18, Tasha Fierse Kennedy, and yours truly.
Although the Ball was at a Yoga Studio, it felt more like an underground hipster basement party and it was a super fun time! I definitely brought the Camp with a look I wore to an Orville Peck Concert where Louisianna Purchaseopened for him, because nothing says “Camp Vogue Ball” like a good ol’ fashion’d cowboy. By the way, Orville Peck’s latest music video, Queen of the Rodeo, just came out and our very first interview guest from is in it!
Peep this motherfucking screenshot. PEEP IT. Now set a reminder on your phone to watch the video l8r. Right now You’ve got more readin’ & listening 2 do.
Another cool and slightly spiritual/superstitious thing was I finally got my camera back from getting it fixed like I mentioned a couple of episodes back and one of the first pictures I ever got to take was of Tasha looking baller as fuck.
Having this as the first pic taken on my newly recovered lens is such fucking poetry. Love this life.
Special mention goes out to my drag mother Chitah Daniels Kennedy and my sister Tequila Rose for both giving the children LIFE during their performances…you can hear Chitah’s endorsement of how fun the night was in the actual audio of this episode, so don’t sleep on that.
Magical Realness
Literally the day after Queer Camp Out, The Ashwell Clinic hosted a performance-style tournament with Austin’s premier drag superstars and an open-to-all mini-ball, both of which together formed Magical Realness. The mini-ball took place just before the tournament, and once again I did my damn thang and showed out.
Although I didn’t win the cash prize for the voguing category, I did win a disqualification for touching despite the fact that my competitor literally squat and sat on me and had already lost her footing resulting in a fall offstage before I placed a hand on her. More on that later… with that being said, I still had an amazing time during the mini-ball goofing off and showing my dancey ass.
The notable moments of the performance tournament started off with an explosive performance by Belladonna, which raised and set the bar for every performance thereafter. Watching her do her thing was like watching a firecracker pop the fuck off, reassemble itself in a barbie box, and disappear. Footage of her full performance is below:
We love to see it. (Video by me, make sure u subscribe hookerz)
Other notable moments include….
Local Queen of gigs Noodles embodying Easter Bunny Realness
There are gigs in that basket. I know it. Photo: Noodle’s Insta
Ultimately, it was Belladonna’s explosive battle cry of a performance that swept up the cash and the crown of Miss Magical Realness 2020.
R.I.P. that fucking ankle. Jk she prolly fine.
Bernie Sanders Rallies in Austin & San Antonio
A prime example of this crazy ass schedule was me going to a San Antonio Bernie Sanders Rally at 4pm until 8pm, stopping at home in San Marcos for a bit until heading off to CyberQueen at Coconut Club from 11:30pm until about 4am all in the same night…. followed by another Bernie Sanders Rally in Austin the very next day.
Why do I do it? Because I love Bernie Sanders and hate myself apparently.
Former San Marcos City Councilwoman Joca Marquez and current campaign co-chair for Bernie Sanders in Texas pictured above at the San Antonio Bernie Sanders Rally. See if you can spot me. (picture by Joca via Twitter)
In all actuality, I only planned on going to the San Antonio rally because Joca Marquez- a local San Marcos city councilwoman and professor at Texas State was set to introduce him to the rally in San Antonio- and that was an opportunity that I couldn’t miss.
The San Antonio Rally (which took place on the night of the Nevada caucus) was such a blast. Before the speakers arrived a Tejano band came out and played some HITS that I’m sure my parents would’ve loved to see.
The crowd in San Antonio was also pretty ecstatic and motivated by the results of the Nevada caucus that we were all watching in real time. In the middle of a speech by Kendrick Sampson (which was very moving btw) the projector displaying CNN finally showed the blowout that Bernie had accomplished, and the dance hall erupted in cheers.
Even with all of their percentages combined, Bernie beat out his competitors by 2.6%, cementing another caucus victory- this time in the much more diverse demographic of Nevada.
Bernie’s speech called out the corrupt powers that be (as always) and the people around me in the rally actually had their own stories about their favorite pieces of Bernie’s platform (which you’ll hear in the audio version of the podcast). After the rally wrapped up, I narrowly missed the chance to shake Bernie’s hand (r.i.p. my will to live). Outside a group of Trump supporters were holding onto a giant “Come and Take it Sign” by the highway where attendees were exiting but…. their sign was facing the wrong way, which seemed appropriate given the circumstances. Ultimately I left the parking lot blaring “We Are The Champions”, with the eager excitement of picturing Bernie versus trump in an ideological battle of the decade.
Seeing the Bern twice in two days…legendary.
As I mentioned before, I only had the intention of going to the San Antonio Rally so that I could get audio for this episode, but upon reviewing the footage afterwards, I realized that I had recorded everything EXCEPT Bernie’s speech. That pretty much cemented to me that I had to go to Austin’s rally the next day and while I initially wanted to scream because of my freshman-like mistake, I was immediately excited about the idea of going to another Bernie rally. Luckily for me, when I went out for Cyberbabes in Austin, I ran into a flight attendant buddy of mine who was leaving that same morning, and he let me borrow his hotel so that I wouldn’t have to drive back into town the next day from San Marcos. Kevin you rock.
Listen to this. I mean really- LISTEN TO THIS. (it’s only like, a minute)
What was really amazing about both rallies was that I got to huge moments in the campaign. In San Antonio, I got to witness Joca Marquez, a San Marcos city council member and member of Our Revolution (Bernie’s grassroots progressive network) introduce Bernie. Shortly after the rally, about a day later, Joca and the Bernie Sanders campaign announced that she had become the newest member as a campaign co-chair of Bernie’s campaign in Texas. I also got to witness Bernie give his Nevada victory speech almost immediately after the results came in, and in Austin I got to witness another huge moment when Bernie got his first endorsement by a past candidate of the very same 2020 race in which he’s competing, Marriane Williamson.
The footage has been cut to Marriane’s speech, but I definitely consider checking out Jim’s first half too. It’s SO beautifully Texan.
Williamson’s endorsement came as a total surprise to those of us in the crowd, and people can feel however they want about Marriane’s questionable science stances- but her speech about being a Texan who gets pissed off about injustice resonated with me more than most people could probably realize. Witnessing the homophobia of the Defense of Marriage Act in the 2000’s as a high school student and understanding its implications for my future self perverted my sense of pride for the flag and what it allegedly stood for- to the point that I would refuse to stand for the moment of silence. The hypocrisy and apathy of my peers was too much to succumb to, and I’d find myself getting oddly warned by teachers that my advocacy might have consequences. Marianne spoke directly to this indignation and brought it in the context of the reformists of the civil rights era, of labor workers, of women and more directly- in the recent focus on healthcare reformation. She spoke to what I’ve been telling people all along about Bernie’s policies and plans- that it’s not radical, and it’s most certainly not impossible, because we’re going to do it for ourselves and for future generations just like those activists of the past did for us.
So back to Magical Realness…
As I mentioned earlier, I was disqualified for touching my opponent even after they had sat on me and already fallen by their own mistake offstage. What I felt immediately on the stage as I was called out for touching was a feeling of animosity from the host and the crowd, as well as a bit of shame- as if I had been accused of pushing my competitor off the stage. I knew I didn’t…or at least I felt like I didn’t.
The sense of anxiety that came soon thereafter was only exacerbated by what I took as a “go fuck yourself” look by the person who I was competing against as I apologized, grabbed my things, and left the stage. What was even worse was that this bubbling sense of anxiety ended up turning into a repeating loop that was telling me “people are going to hate you, you fucking pushed a girl off the stage.” then it reversed into anger like “well I don’t think I pushed her, but even if I did the bitch SAT on me.” Ultimately I knew I had a recording of the incident, and that the facts would be facts.
So what does the video show exactly? We see my competitor squat over me and yes, sit (I literally felt her on me which is why I touched her in the first place) and as she’s already going down I touched her as in “Yeah, that’s what you get.” Her recovery from the stumble was iconic as fuck though, I ain’t mad at her.
Ultimately, I don’t care about the disqualification at all, I don’t care about there being a cash prize, I literally couldn’t even tell you how much money it was because the competitive aspect was just a chance for me to be a dork and get some excess energy out to a crowd that I don’t get to perform in front of very often. Afterwards I had a lot of strangers come up to me and tell me that I was their favorite character of the night and that I gave them life (which tends to happen at these kinds of things) but it was all super fucking sweet, and I was in a state of euphoria from all the love. A couple of my friends (and some strangers) came up and expressed that they thought it was rigged since my competitor was from the same drag house as the hostess, which honestly doesn’t matter to me. Magical Realness was the second ball I’ve ever competed in and again, it was JUST FOR FUN. Ballroom culture in general tends to have a little bit of haus politics here or there and even though I don’t throw “real” ballroom-style balls, I always go out of my way to make the show unbiased and entertaining. Yes, it might not be the most authentic “underground” experience, but it does provide a genuinely entertaining and unbiased experience for my audiences and competitors.
I got accused once in a ball that I hosted of being unfair- in the Haus Battles themed ball that I threw at Stonewall about a year or two ago. The accusation came from a competitor who tried to say that I disqualified her unfairly from the semi-finals when in truth, a last minute submission that I forgot to introduce to the floor came in and got a higher score, excluding her qualification. When she tried later to find other vague ways of accusing me of bias in the scoring I had to remind her in the group chat that I sought out impartial judges from both Austin and San Antonio and a community figure from San Marcos who had no clue about the drag drama bubbling over at the time- it took a lot of work to do, but I did it specifically for situations like that.
Another incident that happened during that ball was that the runner up for the voguing category of the ball asked for the microphone after the results were announced and demanded that the winner and I call out the 5 elements of voguing. I didn’t name them and took the mic back because it was my show and I didn’t feel like I had anything to prove. (hands, face, spins/dips, floorwork and duckwalk btw babes) That competitor was the hostess of this ball, and during her performance against the finalist, she most certainly touched her opponent, so again you could imagine the kind of anxiety that I’d feel about whether or not my disqualification was due to something more.
In all actuality-after the anxiety dust settles, I don’t think it was, and even if it was, I don’t care. Not touching your competitor is a rule in ballroom culture- I didn’t judge the ball that she competed in and that I hosted, but I do believe that her touching the winner is what ultimately costed her 1st place, even if the judges weren’t familiar with judging vogue battles, so me suffering the same consequence of not qualifying for the next round makes sense in a way. Even though my competitor “sat” on me, I ultimately don’t think she meant to. Ballroom culture is eccentric in its own ways. Don’t. Fucking. Touch.
It should also be said that upon reviewing the video myself, I think that my competitor was genuinely doing a better job than me. I was pretty winded from competing against someone in my round before and if I really did feel some type of way about my disqualification, I could’ve pulled a ballroom gag and apologized, while also politely asking for a re-do to prove that my slip-up was a misunderstanding & that I could do the damn thang. What’s a ball without some drama after all? Nah, the truth is she was doing better than me anyways and I’m such a newbie to the scene that I forgot no matter how bad someone shades you in a performance- you’ve gotta keep all hands off.
This whole debacle got me thinking though- in that hazy time between the competition wrapping up and me reviewing the video for myself, what was the truth? I kept thinking back to the immediate seconds following up to the disqualification and thinking “what is the truth, what is the truth?” The gasps brought on by my competitor falling were followed up with eyes looking at me after I had just touched her- did Cady Heron really push Regina George in front of that bus?
And in the clarity that usually reveals itself after anxiety-induced spirals, I came to the conclusion that the truth evolves. My perception in the anxiety following up to self-titling of the pusher in chief was my reality and truth for a split second. The details in between everything were also separate truths. Anxiety has a funny way of manifesting itself, and it usually takes the form of conspiracy theories about yourself. Ultimately after the haze, I came back to reality and recognized that the house battles incident was years ago, that it probably didn’t factor into my disqualification, and that even if it did, my main objective was to have fun- so mission accomplished. It should also be said that I talked with the hostess Ms.Girl6 a.k.a. Mother Lepore about these incidents, this episode, and how it dealt with anxiety & perceptions of truth. While she doesn’t believe that she touched her competitor in that ball a year or two ago, we both respectfully recognized that we have different perspectives of it, that it was years ago, and that it was irrelevant to the events of that night at Magical Realness.
How else does the truth evolve?
Right now we live in an age where digital information permeates at unfathomable speeds- just google fiber optic cable speeds and get your mind blown. In a lot of ways the methods and formats that we consume media impacts our perceptions, and through our experiences with our forms of media-our perceptions become our own individual truths. Ultimately in my experience, you can’t ever come to an agreement with someone until you both have an acknowledgement and understanding of truth in the form of an event happening. Once you can acknowledge that something happened, only then can you begin discussing your own perceptions, your emotional truth.
Where things begin to get tricky is how the digital age is so heavily built upon algorithms and once those algorithms are exploited, the other perceptions that challenge narratives get thrown into the void, and it gets harder to build a comprehensive range of perceptions. I’d like to say that most of the times the truth is in the middle ground, but another part of me knows that’s just journalism school programming that’s built upon the notion of always being unbiased, and I think that for a lot of topics unbiased is best, but this age of information and disinformation makes it so incredibly hard to tell the difference. I consider myself someone who looks at everything skeptically and most of the time I don’t feel comfortable sharing a “hot take” opinion on something unless I’m just joking around and ready to roast something for the sake of a laugh, or if I’m dead set on acknowledging my perceptions of truth based off of what I know or think I know. As you can imagine that lead to a lot of fights with my family when I was growing up and to this day my mom still kind of calls me a know-it-all, but a lot of this information skepticism comes from growing up in the infancy of a hyper-digital society and seeing how ethics hasn’t always kept up with technology.
One of my favorite video game series Metal Gear Solid continues to play a role in how I interpret the potential consequences of technological dominance. In this game, an artificial intelligence has seized military, economic, political and biological power against society. In this world military technologies have become easily integrated into everyday society and your main character is a clone who has to fight other versions of himself that are threatening to launch a nuclear strike against the center of the dominating artificial intelligence network. In Metal Gear Solid Two, there’s a part where the character you’re playing inserts a virus into the network and it’s revealed that the team who was supporting him through his biocommunication device is actually part of the system of artificial intelligences that used his memories of people he knows in real life as a manifestation tool to manipulate him and carry out their orders. As your father (one of the anarchistic figures hell bent on destroying the system) reveals his intent, the virus continues to work its way through the network, and the A.I. goes off on an existential rant about its origins and the futility of mankind’s judgement in controlling popular narratives in the digital age:
If you want to check out the whole video game series as a movie, YouTube Metal Gear Solid The Movie and go ham, it’s a really great series. I recommend starting with two, going from there, and ignoring the first game. It’ll take a good couple of hours to go through but it’s made by a video game creator who initially wanted to write movies for Hollywood, so the game itself is really a cinematic masterpiece, especially as the games go on and the platforms became more graphically advanced.
Just the other day I went to an award ceremony for a past university professor of mine and she gave a lecture about her roots in the tech world and the ways she’s seen technology manifest itself into curriculum and culture. At the end we were able to ask questions and I asked her about what platform or innovation in technology excites her the most right now. Interestingly enough, without even being prompted about anxieties she spoke about her weariness of the potential for artificial intelligence and ethics. She specifically pointed to Facebook’s acknowledgement of being exploited by Russia for political purposes and said she thought that an ethics officer would’ve probably seen something like this coming sooner, had one been on the Facebook board in its infancy. She also talked about how positions like that should possibly have an influence on whether or not these companies grow beyond their initial scopes as their potential consequences become more impactful.
For the most part I believe truth is in the eye of the beholder, but when it comes to tech it may actually lie in the circuitry of the algorithm, or the code of society’s collective anxieties. Just like the bots that spread misinformation, it’s up to us to upload our own positivity and level-headed thinking to ourselves, even if it’s in the midst of a self-hacking anxiety attack. Which is much easier said than done.
Meme of The Week | W-W-Walmart
Speaking of sharing things and algorithms- this week’s Meme of the Week is a series brought to you from Twitter by user l0rd.adrean who posted this fuckery on instagram. I call these couple of posts W-W-Walmart, it’s like WWE but even MORE dangerous…because who knows how clean those floors are after you’re done wiping your face off it.
The way the referee’s face lights up makes me think they found a random teenager in the bike section, gave him $5 and a referee shirt, and it took 30 seconds for him to maybe realize that this was all a bad idea.
This one isn’t technically in a Walmart, but it’s still one of the best ones on his account. Bless.
TV Review- Next in Fashion
I didn’t really think that I would ever watch this show, let alone review it- but something about my mini-obsession with designs and designers right now told me “you have a lot of spare time on your hands, why not?”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a2W0ivtnXjY
You’ll see what I’m talking about with these two pretty quickly.
Next in Fashion is basically Netflix’s answer to Project Runway, and the things PR does Next in Fashion attempts to do better. It’s hosted by Alexa Chung ( a contributing editor to British Vogue) and Tan France from Queer Eye-and while we’re used to seeing Tan in a happy TLC/HGTV kind of vibe, the show does a disappointing job of making him come off as the nice guy that we know and love from Queer Eye. My biggest gripe comes from an obsession by Tan and Alexa on focusing on a team of two black female contestants- Farai and Kiki who continue to “miss the mark” on their challenges. While I disagree with some of the critiques not lining up with the challenge’s aim, it becomes apparent that the guest judge of the episode, Kerby Jean Raymond of PyerMoss , seems to be more perturbed by how these contestants were harshly critiqued than Tan was, but that doesn’t seem to stop him from queuing in the dramatic reality tv waterworks and being redeemed as the sympathetic host and hero of the episode. That episode and the one immediately following it was a huge disappointment.
The biggest hesitation that I had in watching Next In Fashion, or any type of design competition show again was that I really disliked the bully-like atmosphere that the judges of of Project Runway habitually inflicted on contestants. This type of caustic criticism usually coupled with my own inherent disagreements about style or elimination choices were enough to make me wonder why I was watching rich sociopaths verbally abuse creative people who were just trying their best. While Next in Fashion maintains the questionable critiques, elimination choices, and personality/style favoritism that Project Runway had, it ditches the council of sociopaths that dominated Project Runway and seems to replace them with the bubbly, slightly snobbish gay boyfriend meets girlfriend vibe that Tan and Alexa exude as a pair. All in all, it’s a fun show with minor setbacks in presentation- a lot of the editing choices that show off Tan’s tone-deafness are….choices…the pre-runway show introductions and banter add nothing but frustration to what should be suspense and the consistent ending clips begging you to stream the rest in a binge-watch session get old from the very first episode. The airy and trite criticisms from Tan,“it doesn’t look expensive”, France makes me wonder how the producers weren’t aware of how off-putting some of these moments could be for the very same audience that’s used to seeing him be more cerebral, constructive, and “authentically nice” in Queer Eye. That lack of awareness combined with its lack of ambition in crafting a more self-aware narrative comes off as a bit amateurish for a brand that showcases such world-class talent.
Thankfully, the saving grace of the show is its platform of introducing a huge diversity of talented designers and a sweeping sensation of aesthetic power. As I concluded Next in Fashion, I began re-watching older episodes of Project Runway and the differences between the two were pretty stark stylistically- with Next in Fashion leaving a much better feeling in my stomach after watching….but just barely. Ultimately I’d say skip the ending scenes and binge it without being prompted, but also follow up with tweeting the show after you’re done (or while you’re watching) and tell them to make better choices. With shows like The Big Family Cooking Showdown, we’ve realized that not every single competition show has to be fueled by shady plot points, blatant favoritism, and bitterness. Although Next in Fashion is nowhere near as caustic as other reality competition shows, we can always strive for better- in tone and presentation.
Stand out designers (my opinion) from the show include
There are definitely more designers on the show that are amazing and I’d love to go through them all but the show literally had 18 competitors total, so if you want to see what they can do, check out Next in Fashion!
Song of the Week
The crown has been passed down for the song of the week this week. In Episode 2 we crowned Divine’s Love Reaction, and it’s only fitting that this week it’s been moved from one source of personal and artistic inspiration to another. This week we put on red lipstick, grab our pom poms and saddle shoes, and pay homage to a vision so queer brought to you by Cheer Captain ! This synthy bop is brought to you by one of my drag siblings, Vestite (a.k.a. Hentaii) who I shouted out in Episode 1, and it’s part of a four-track EP called Modern Phenomenon (which is totally out now on a ton of platforms btw)
Cheer Captain – 2020 has never felt SO 80’s
Cheer Captain resonates on a new wave synth frequency that up until now I thought was damn near impossible to replicate, but Vestite captures such a unique experience in just four minutes. You can dance around to it, you can sing it obnoxiously at someone, you can even mentally soliloquize your own existential battles with perfection while you’re going to work! What’s not to love about that?
Between the haunting melodies and the impressive usage of voice modulation- the entirety of Modern Phenomenon is definitely worth a listen. I’d recommend throwing it on to any type of 80’s playlist that you’ve got, and giving the whole project a chance to grow on you. So far my favorites are; the extraterrestrial hippy dance party crossover vibe conjured by Modern Phenomenon, the facetious social critiques of Cheer Captain, and the sexy sensitive seance conjured by Spirit Board.
No shade to Cull me from the Litter…it’s just hella sad and I’m a sensitive soul, lol.
Peep the most repeated on my repeat playlist….the stan is real.
As I’ve mentioned before, the song of the week segment is one of my favorite things about this podcast. The songs that I choose always have a hella special place in my heart, which is why it’s SO FUCKING FIRE that this week’s song of the week is by one of my drag siblings and favorite sources of inspiration- Hentaii/Vestite!
Sick and Tired….Literally
Literally my plans once all this sh*t uploads.
Unfortunately for me, prior to Queer camp out, I hadn’t been getting much sleep from working out and wilding out after editing episode #2 DNWDITW- that combined with the fact that I was at another ball the very next day doing the absolute most resulted in a total body shut-down. I was physically sore and my body gave up from exhaustion.
I got sick with a fever, my acne resurfaced and everything felt like hell. it didn’t wear off until an entire week, which eventually lead to episode #3 coming out later than originally expected… and then on top of that, while I was editing this episode my cat knocked my laptop over when I had ten minutes of editing left….and didn’t save. After I eventually got over from the depression that that triggered, I started working on it again and got sick AGAIN. The show as a whole is running about a week and a half/two weeks behind its intended schedule, and even as I’m typing this I know my sickness is resurfacing. UGH.
It’s okay though! I love this show too much to let things get in my way, there’s just so many awesome experiences and thoughts that I want to share with you, and the more I think about how happy it makes me to finally push “upload” on these projects, the more secure I feel in pursuing this project with all my heart, and knowing that it’s the right choice. As I’ve mentioned before, if you wanna help support the show, Venmo/Patreon me some dolla$ with a cute note of something that made you laugh, smile or think- or just share the podcast and the memes with your friends- it’s FREE!
Love you guys so much, Hope you’re washing your hands. 💋
After Scouring the Courtyard of Her Majesty’s Palace…
Or in this case -her apartment complex- for what seemed like half a day- we eventually got to sit down and meet with the first guest of The Greggo Show, Miss Louisianna Purchase!
You can play episode 3 in the embedded play above. We’re also available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere else where Satan is hailed.
WARNING: DRAGULA SEASON 3 SPOILERS INBOUND. IF YOU HAVEN’T STARTED WATCHING IT ON NETFLIX PLEASE GET YOUR LIFE TOGETHER AND MEET US BACK HERE– SKIP THIS EPISODE IF YOU NEED TO SIS!
Touting a freshly dyed neon-green haircut and paired with two other bowls of greenery, we sat down on the eve of her flight to the Dragula European Tour with the Mother of Darkness herself and discuss some of her most memorable moments on Dragula, her 2020 projects (a Hard Candy Presents Tour and a musical project with Mr.Kitty) Satanism, and coping with existential pressures.
G: So where’s the first place you’re heading to for the tour in Europe?
L: “The first place is London. I’ve been there before for DragWorld UK last August and I did a burlesque number in Kent and that was a lot of fun! I’m not looking forward to the long ass flight though butEvahand I are flying there together tomorrow, so I’m excited for that.”
The lesbian school teachers you wish you had tbh – selfie by Evah Destruction
G: That’s amazing! How is it working with Evah now?
L: “I love having Evah in Austin, it’s nice not only having her in closer proximity, but we have her in Die Felicia now and it’s so much fun. I enjoy having her in town and it’s nice to have all your Judy’s that you hang out with, but it’s also nice to have someone that I can hang out and talk Dragula shop with. “
G: I got really great video of her [at Die Felicia] doing that crazy F*@king Duckwalking that I call “The Clown Car” (Sidenote: Instagram destroyed it by corrupting the file memory, redemption is necessary!)
L: “It’s insane, I’m like oh god girl, your knees are very strong, ’cause I’m like, no …I can’t do that.”
Photo by Homoduplex/Yovska’s instagram- dude takes amazing pictures
G: How was it having Yovskastay with you while she was in Austin for Die Felicia?
L: Oh it was awesome, I enjoyed Yovska and loved having her around on the show, her mind and imagination is insane. I always thought it was cute when she’d say cunty things- I’d be like
G: So a lot of what I guess you could say is “your brand” is like spooky and dark stuff, but what else would you say is very *Louisiana Purchase*?
L: As much as I love Dark and Spooky stuff, I also love stereotypically feminine things. I really like the balance of softness and darkness and that’s what makes it interesting to me. I’m not interested in just like one side not being balanced by the other- I kind of like the balance of light and darkness..that’s what I enjoy myself.”
G: Like that pink fairy/vampire look you did on the show.
L: “Yeah, that’s what I love- balancing Macabre and sweetness. That’s why a lot of some of my favorite movies like The Love Witch are my favorite- it takes that macabre/witchcraft element and wraps it up in this soft pastel world that’s really ultra-feminine and I just think that’s so smart and so interesting. In a lot of my favorite older vampire films, all of the female protagonists are very glamorous and very soft and I like that horror wrapped-in-beauty.
G: So what inspired that Pink Scythe look then?
L: “That whole look was inspired specifically by a vampire film called Fascination, it’s by one of my favorite directors, Jean Rollin- he was a french director that directed lots of horror/vampire films where the vampire protaganists were women and it’s all kind of like verging on sexploitation – a lot of lesbian scenes and things like that, it’s all very soft and feminine but a horror film.”
The Fascination cover that inspired Louisianna’s Vampire look
G: Is that when you knew you were a lesbian?
L: “Exactly, that’s when I knew I was a lesbian, I’ve been a lesbian forever. *laughs* But, the movie poster and the cover of the DVD of Fascination has a female vampire but she’s in a black cape and she’s holding a scythe- so I took the pastel world of soft and feminine pinks and married it with the imagery of fascination. I was nervous to bring it, because it’s a gamble no matter what you do, you never know what the judges will like and not like but I’m happy I stuck to my guns, and I actually made top 3 in that episode, I was very excited to share that with Hollow and Landon. “
G: So when you said that looks can be ia bit of a gamble- in relation to the other contestants on the show, they’re very horror and you’re very glamour with horror elements- did you feel like your style was a potential liability going into the show?
L: “Definitely. I knew that I would have to adapt my style to some point and I was actually really excited about that challenge and I think that’s why I did as well as I did. I knew that the way to succeed in a competition is to give them exactly what they ask for. For example, the Dungeons and Drag Queen episode, I think Drac said that he wanted a bigger silhouette, and he kept motioning towards his shoulders, so I knew that for the next challenge for Trash Queen that I’d produce a big silhouette, a silhouette that I’ve never done before. ”
the resemblance was kind of uncanny, truly.
G: Whenever we mentioned the Dungeons and Drag Queens Episode, that was an extremely different look for you.
L: “Yeah it was the only time I was blonde on the show, I rarely wear blonde wigs. I also didn’t know SHIT about Dungeons and Dragons but I was like ‘it’s like Lord of The Rings but you play it!’ My inspiration really came from Galadriel. “
#IThinkTheySawMyVagina
G: Well, you looked amazing! You looked like you could do a fuckin’ backflip!
L:Well I did a roundhouse kick during in the video, but I think they edited it out because you could see my vagina!
G: Your Trash Queen look kind of reminded me of like Mad Max Faggotry…
Slime in me, slime mother
L: “Yeah it really was like a mix of Lana Del Rey- that’s who inspired the hair- but the black root into the dirty silver, that was inspired Divine and of course the kind of look was inspired by Divine. It really was like if Divine fucked Lana Del Rey. “
G: Divine is my favorite, I’ve been jamming so hard to Love Reaction by her lately. Have you seen “You think You’re a Man.” when she comes in on that Lowrider?!
L: ” It’s so good. Kids who only know her from the John Waters films should look her up, she has great music . I love “Shake it Up”, I’ve performed it quite a few times. “
G: WHEN?!
L: “It was formy troupe PooPooPlatter, we do a lot of tribute shows and we did a Divine vs Rupaul night , our guest was Violencia! We both did a Divine and Rupaul number. but for Shake it Up I was in a super tight asymmetrical, sequined, tiger print dress. I had two of my drag daughters who are my GoGo Boys for Die Felicia Canaan and Chasen as my backup dancers and they were fantastic and I ate a piece of fake shit out of Canaan’s ass. “
Louisianna’s Go-Go boys are the fucking bomb and inspirations within their own rights as well. Left is Chasen and right is Canaan
G: What is it that you said that you ate?
L: “It was a piece of- it was a Larabar that we molded into a turd., and we stuck it in his ass crack, and at the end of his number i just pull his G-string aside and eat it out of his butt. I was going to seriously go to town and just eat it out with my mouth but I was like “no you have another number girl , you don’t wanna fuck up your makeup'”
It might’ve been an amazing performance, but I hate to break it to Louisianna…Divine invented eating shit.
G: So I know of Die Felicia, but what shows do you do here in Austin?
L: “I do Die Felicia every month- that’s with Zane Zena, and I’m a member of PooPooPlatter, that’s where I got my start in drag. We do both of those shows at Elysium. I also do a show with Ruby Knight called Sad Girls only and I do a monthly Bingo gig at St.Elmo Brewery every third Wednesday of the month. Those are my monthly local gigs here in town.
I have an idea for a new show that’s brewing- I’m talking to some people about it so hopefully we’ll see it at the end of the year- that’s what I’m hoping for anyways. “
G: So you mentioned you got your start in PooPooPlatter earlier, how did that come about?
L: “October 18th was my very first performance and it was their halloween show. I didn’t become a member until years later, Zane Zena and I became a member at the same time. “
G: It’s essentially a drag troupe, right?
“Yeah it’s a drag troupe. We have 6 members. Right now It’s the mother of the house Bulimianne Rhapsody...”
G: You’re good friends with her right? (/s)
L: “We’re married! Yeah! We had started dating February 2013 “
Hopefully Louisiana’s hubby doesn’t purge that Taco. – Lousianna’s hubby and scissorwife Bulimianne Rhapsody
G: Where is it that you guys got married, it was like Sci-fi themed, right?
L: “Yeah we got married last July, July 6th in Las Vegas, it was Mars Attacks!-themed. “
But yeah I met Bulimianne, and then slowly my friends became drag queens and I was like ‘I wanna do what my friends are doing!’ So I bugged and bugged and bugged, I was like ‘let me be in the Halloween show, let me be in the Halloween show!’ and he just told me no, then eventually he said yes and that was October 13th- that was my first performance, but that’s how I got my start with PooPoo Platter.”
G: How many times did you have to ask before you got a damn show?
L: “I think I like three or four, I was like I promise I won’t embarrass you, I promise. ”
G: So persistence is key?
L: ” Persistence is key. Lots of blowjobs.
I don’t think that’s how blowjobs work Louisianna…but good 4 u bby | Photo by Corin Smith Photography
But yeah I performed that October, then again in December and then after that performance I never stopped. The only month I’ve taken off for drag was when I filmed for Dragula, and that wasn’t really a break from drag, I just wasn’t publicly performing. “
Louisianna with her fellow Season 3 Ghouls
G: What month was that?
L: ” That was in March, so we’re coming up on a year that we filmed. It’s gone by so fast…it’s been a whirlwind for sure. “
Left to Right: Vestite, previously known as Hentaii, me, my drag mother Chitah Daniels Kennedy, Cupcake, Zane Zena and Louisianna Purchase at Violent Femme March 2018 hosted by Vestite and Ruby Knight
G: So you said that you do Die Felicia with Zane Zena, I know that you guys are like really great friends, how did that friendship come about?
L: ” “I met Zane the night that I met Bulimianne- I had went to a PooPoo Platter, I think it was the third [event] they ever had and Zane was a guest, and so a lot of the friends I have today I met that night and when I found out she was really into horror movies and the music she was into we became super super close friends really fast.
And then we started Die Felicia I wanna say like four years ago, ’cause we were like ‘there’s no spooky shows!’ We would look forward to October every year ’cause we would get to pull out all the spooky numbers we wanted to do throughout the year and we were like ‘why not just have a show where it’s Halloween every month?’ and people were really responsive to it. I remember the very first one Christeenecame out and we were so excited, we were like ‘We did it, we did it Diva!!” But yeah I co-produce Die Felicia with Zane, and Sad Girls I produce with Ruby Knight. “
Ruby (on the right) Berlin Fatale, and Bambi PVC (R.I.P., idk lol)
G: I love Ruby too, she’s so beautiful. Every time- I’m just infuriated.
L: “Yeah Ruby is an amazing queen, I think she started like a year before I did and I remember when I started I was so fucking busted looking and I’d be like ‘oh my god you’re so pretty!’ and she still is- she’s still gorgeous, a great performer, I love her on a mic, she’s fun, she’s relevant, she’s fashionable, she’s like everything you want in a queen, you know you’re gonna get a great look, you know you’re gonna get a good performance. She’s super sweet and she’s one of my closest friends.
I love that in Austin we actively hang out with each other outside of drag. Just in my complex alone you have Bulimianne and I, then upstairs you have my daughters Sticky Gold and ChiqueFillatio, then PapiChurro lives here, LizDexia lives here so just in my complex and in my day to day life I see a lot of my drag community and my friends everyday, and I actively hang out with Noodles and Tatianna Cholula, Ruby…”
G: It’s a very interesting generation of Drag that we’ve got going on right now.
L: ” It is! I think Austin has had a couple of golden moments of drag. I think the heyday of Castro’s Warehouse on 4th ; that place gave birth to so many queens, kings, performers, that was a really golden moment of Austin drag and if you were around during that time, you were very lucky. I got my start at PooPoo Platter. but I was at Castro’s every single weekend.
How I went about my whole first year of drag was I walked around with a mix CD in my purse and anywhere I went I’d just show up in drag and ask if there was a spot, and they’d be like ‘it’s for tips, it’s for no pay’ and I did a loooot of that. The way to get better is by performing, and I just wanted to be on stage as much as possible because I did suffer from stagefright at the beginning and I knew that was something that I wanted to get over because I love doing drag so much, and oh I eventually did.”
G: Was she still Louisianna Purchase back then?
L: ” I have always and only been Louisianna Purchase. There’s no secret drag names or anything out there.”
G: Have you done stuff with P1nkstar and them [Y2K]?
L: ” I’ve done shows with them and they’ve booked me for a lot of their events, I enjoy them a lot, they’re so much fun. “
G: So when you were doing Dragula, as it came to the end..how do you think your life would be different if you had won?
L: ” I’m sure to some extent it would be different for anyone who would have won because it means you won a reality drag show competition, but I’m very pleased with my Top 4 position. I feel I got to showcase a lot of different sides of my drag and I got to compete in every episode- I got to compete in every challenge and I’m in episode except for the last one, I’m the closest queen to top 3 so Fuck Yeah that’s awesome!”
G: *Laughing* “So suck a d!&%, I’m in it!”
I was just gonna follow that up too because whenever I said different, that was assuming that there is a difference- just because you win doesn’t necessarily mean that your life is going to change and suddenly be full of meaning, and all that- y’know?
L: ” Yeah same thing with being in the show, it’s all what you make of it. Going into and leaving, I knew that the show wasn’t going to be the end-all be-all. It’s not like you do the show and the gigs are gonna start pouring in Diva. No, you still have to work, hone your craft, create content, just like I’ve done prior to the show. I’m very fortunate that I’ve gotten to perform all over the United States prior to Dragula, and have had a taste of what that lifestyle post-Dragula has become which is a lot of traveling, a lot of traveling, touring, and performing all around- that’s what I wanted, that’s why I went on the show, to showcase my drag and to have the opportunity to perform everywhere being a working, performing drag queen is my initial goal.
That’s my initial goal, I have a lot of surprises happening in 2020 actually, there’s a lot that I’d like to chat about but don’t have the greenlight to chat about yet, but I will say that as great as 2019 was and it really was great year for me- I’m really excited for this year and the things I’ve got coming up- especially one thing in particular, oh y’all are gonna gag when you see it! I don’t know if it will be out by the time this airs, because I have no idea when it’s gonna air. But yeah everyone’s gonna gag when it’s out because I sure as hell gagged while we were making it. But that’s all I can say about it until it’s out…hopefully soon
G: I think I know what that thing is, and I also can’t fucking wait.
L: ” I think it will be able to show me to a different audience that might not know me through Dragula or drag shows, which is an exciting prospect. “
G: So earlier when you mentioned you’ve already been working as a drag queen for a while, Dragula was kind of a vehicle for taking it a step further, I think one of the things a lot of people think about whenever we see- I mean everyone on the show in a way becomes a queer icon because we’re so heavily influenced by the media we consume.
I mean love it or hate it, there’s a reason why every Rupaul’s Drag Race Winner becomes idolized in a certain way, and I think one interesting thing about you is that you’ve already kind of been that, and it’s weird because the show in the way that it highlighted those wonderful attributes of yours the genorisity, the empathy and everything- have you seen that transformation online in your fan mail too in how people reach out to you?
L: “Oh definitely. I’m very fortunate to have a really amazing local fanbase and support system, I feel completely taken care of by my community-but post Dragula, post Meet our Monsters especially, that’s when the floodgates opened.
” I remember after Meet Our Monsters was released, I had to turn my phone off because my notifications went crazy.” – Louisianna Purchase
It was exciting and it still is, once it got dropped from Amazon Prime and Netflix picked it up it was like the whirlwinds started all over again and a whole new group of people were exposed to it through Netflix. I only got like two hateful comments that I happened to catch and honey it’s like block and delete, like where’s your show diva? I try to take the good and the bad with a grain of salt. The way I look at it is everything is temporary, and this too will be temporary. It’s my privilege and my joy to have the platform to work it, to morph it to change it over time. To keep it relevant, to keep it interesting to me and for audiences. Now the fun really begins, it’s in my ballpark now. It’s only limitited to what I want to do and bring and thankfully the well hasn’t run dry and I have a lot of ideas. There’s still a lot of things I want to do in my own community as well as the rest of the world.
Y’know I work really hard, all drag performers work really hard no matter what scale you’re at, but it’s important to connect to that source of inspiration and to me that’s watching TV, listening to music, anything to sort of stimulate my imagination. It’s also important to take care of yourself physically, mentally and inspire yourself and I’m very lucky to that that’s been going very strong. “
G: One of the things that I think about daily – I consider myself pretty existenialist- so like being in a situation where like a lot of people give a shit about you seems overwhelming but it must be really awesome though because whenever people do fall in love with you and what you’re putting out there…to know that you’re an inspiration to people…that’s pretty fucking cool.
L: “Yeah it’s very humbling. Those types of messages really started coming in after my moment with Yovska, and that’s when it really, really, really started And it’s very humbling. I had people send me very very personal lengthy messages and I read everything, it’s hard to respond to everything but I most certainly read it all. It’s humbling that you touch people and that you move people. I’ve definitely been that person too, I’ve definitely written people that inspire me. I think it’s good, I think it’s healthy to have a guiding star to like shine the way. We all need that in moments of our lives and hopefully the end result is you lift your own sail at the end of it, which I’m very lucky that I’m at the point in my drag where the character of Louisianna Purchase really inspires me, she’s like a living art project. “
G: How many Tattoos have you seen yourself on? Because I imagine that’d be awesome
L: ” Well there’s four that I know of, there’s one in particular that I screencapped because I was like that is really fucking awesome. This great illustrator their Instagram handle is NikiniKill, did a group illustration of us and St.Lucia has it tattoed on her ribs and that’s amazing. I love my cast, but I don’t know if I’m getting all of them tattooed on me. “
Serving Big Top Energy with Yovska & Mrs.Purchase at Die Felicia’s Jim Henson Tribute Show | Photo by Kaptured by Kadaver
G: Yeah I couldn’t believe when Yovska got tattooed, that was insane.
L: “That was pretty funny, I love for her that it’s a tramp stamp, at least she doesn’t have to look at it.
G: Except for on video…
L: ” Except for on the video, it’ll live forever on video!”
G: So a little backstory on this podcast that I started. I basically wanted it for like three years and [in my first episode] on this last new years eve, I talked about finally getting over that creative anxiety, so I’m wondering- what’s your relationship like in terms of your insecurity in relation to your art?
L: “Oh I was extremely fearful going into Dragula, I was a complete and utter mess leading up to leaving for it, like a bundle of panic and nerves and insecurities. I’m the kind of person that mulls things over in my mind over and over again until I get there, and then I’m like ‘well now I just have to do it, and if you don’t know how you’ll fake it ’till you make it.’ It was weird for me, Dragula felt like a bootcamp. I knew we were competing, but I mostly felt in competition with myself about how far I was willing to go and compromise on my own ideals about drag. It really felt like going through drag queen bootcamp. I really didn’t want to staple gun my leg too I was afraid to do that.
G: There was one part that really resonated with me and it’s basically the only time we ever really see you shaken and it’s when you’re in the bottom and mention not wanting to be a ‘fucking failure’ or another part of ‘what they would say’ when you came back.
L: “Yeah I really went into Dragula wanting to prove that Austin Drag is amazing, and it was not imposed on me by anybody, it was totally self-imposed pressure but but I felt the weight of the Austin Drag community on my shoulders and I wanted to prove that we’re amazing, that what we have is very special and unlike any other drag scene in the world. I knew I wanted to win, and that if not, I wanted to at least get top 3 and in the last supper I talked about how dissapointed I was with what happened but now I’ve made peace with it and see the pros of my placement for sure.
G: And how do you cope with the relationship with those anxieties, like how do you take them on?
L: ” Girl 4-4-7, that’s all I could do on set. It’s that breathing exercise where you breathe in for four, you hold it for four and release for seven seconds. It’s just a way to recenter yourself and recenter your mind to pull you out of that panic-attack like state. But like one lesson that I learned and it’s not the most fun lesson to learn but I definitely feel like it’s a necessary lesson to learn is that for as much support that I have had in my life …
….At the the end of the day I’m not gonna have my community there holding my hand while I’m getting staple-gunned, you’re left to your own devices and at the end of the day it’s up to you to do this. I guess how I handle fear is half being gentle with myself physically and focusing on breathing and the other half ‘you’ve got to do this, you’re gonna fucking do this’.
Nothing like that first sensation of being stapled, to be like ‘oh that’s how it feels, now we’ve gotta keep going.”
– Louisianna Purchase
G: “Is that up there with like the craziest shit you think you’ve ever done? Like physcially?”
L” Definitely as far as pain leve…actually there was something that hurt worse on the show, and you didn’t really get to see it on the show. For the monsters of Rock challenge I got my entire thumb lanced completely through with a 16-inch needle and let me tell you…your thumb will make a popping sound. I almost puked.”
G: “You didn’t pass out from that?! “
L: ” No, thankfully. I think the adrenaline kept me going”
G: ” So I’ m just gonna start pushing the conspiracy theories now that you didn’t actually faint during the staple gun, you said it was like a 16-inch needle?!”
L: “Yeah, it literally was..and also with the passing out there were a lot of other factors besides the staple gun. I was in a 24-inch corset for like 12 hours, I didn’t eat I had no water, my blood sugar completely plummeted. They had to give me water and candy to bring me back. The needle thing was unexpected and I had to perform and get back there on stage so my body went into override.
I will tell you this, when we were done filming, my body literally convulsed in the green room, like I just had the shakes and couldn’t stop.”
G: “Anything for art.”
L: ” Yeah reality TV is not for the weak spirited, you’ve got to be strong hunny.”
G: ” So I’ve always wondered, back to darkness kind of being an overarching thing- Are you a satanist? Like for real for real?”
L: ” Yeah, Maxi and I talked about it on the show a little bit but it didn’t get aired, we talked about it briefly. But yeah, practicing satanist. To which, a lot of people are like ‘ookaay…’ but like you have satanists that are like atheists y’know they don’t actually believe in God or Satan. A lot of satanists just view Satan as an image, an icon, an ideal. You know because quite honestly just even aesthetic-wise it’s fun to be ‘blasphemous’ it’s fun to be naughty. I grew up and was raised catholic, but no longer. I broke away in my late teens or twenties, I was rebellious and was like ‘oh no, you don’t respect me, I can’t respect you.”
“Satanisn to me is like your divinity is within, like power to the people.”
G: Well from what I’ve read of it a lot of Satanism is like you said where they’re atheists that don’t believe in God as a concept to begin with or doesn’t agree with it, but most of it is almost kind of like that with a hedonistic bent on it?
L: ” Yeah it’s kind of like do what you want but don’t fuck anybody over. That’s like the extent of it quite honestly, Y’know be kind, enjoy your life while you’re here. I just try to live my life and treat others how I want to be treated. There’s like different forms of Satanists out there who don’t believe. “
G: ” What would you say that your form is?”
L: ” I’m a satanist who also practices magic. There’s a lot of satanists who practice witchcraft and I happen to be one of them, and that’s just more like there’s a ritualistic aspect to how I live my life- and y’all don’t get scared thinking I’m sacrificing goats and stuff. I just take forms of witchcraft which is just nature magic and it’s all a part of this really entangled belief system that’ I’ve morphed and changed since I’ve gotten older.”
G: ” It’s basically a form of using symbols for manifestation, right? “
L: ” Yeah I’m a big believer in manifesting. Definitely. “
G: ” Arthur’s cathouse is so modern and kind of looks like it belongs in Chile, have you ever been? “
L: ” No, I’ve never been but I’m definitely trying to do more travel overseas this year. That’s a goal for sure. I’ve got new looks, new photoshoots new show ideas, all brewing at different stages.
I know I’ve kind of talked about it a little bit, but I’m working on an album with Mr.Kitty-We’re kind of deep into it. We’ll finish that this year but hunny it ain’t gonna be a drag queen bop ‘Ding! Buy it on ITunes’ type of thing; I play the theremin and it’s gonna be an electronic, mostly instrumental album. More of a atmospheric piece that I’ll be able to perform live and integrate into drag. “
G: That”s so awesome, it’s gonna be really meta to use yourself to evolve.
L: “It’s a really fun project- I’ve been friends and a fan of Mr.Kitty for a long time. After multiple hangouts we were like yeah let’s do it, let’s make that theremin record. Mr.Kitty took the bull by the horns and started so I was like ‘yeah we’re really doing this! “
G: So you said like two months?
L: ” I don’t know how long it’ll take. It’ll definitely be out this year and we’ll be finished working on it soon. I’ve got the Dragula European tour, when I come back I’ve got the Hard Candy Tour and then in March I’ll be doing a smaller tour around Baltimore, D.C., Pittsburgh, I’ll be in New York- I’m excited for all of the travelling that I’ll be doing the next couple of months. “
That was pretty much all of my questions, thank you so much!
L: ” Yay, thank you baby, that was so much fun!”
If you’re interested in seeing the mother of Darkness herself, come on out to Die Felicia this Friday or catch her on her Hard Candy Presents Tour.
As mentioned in the episode, we now have a Patreon available for sustaining support for The Greggo show as well as Venmo @ GregGoneWild where you can now use “production” in the notes to add to our production fund or leave a comment with a line from the show that made you smile, laugh, or think as a separate contribution.
Thank you so much for your support of the show, hope you’re doing lovely. ✨🌈🥰
In oursecond episodeof The Greggo Show: Greggo turns 25, discovers the hydromassage, defeats Facebook, and dodges the draft. We also discuss a recap of the 2020 Ball (hosted by SisterFisters and The House of Lepore), an update is given about The Greggo Show Production Fundraiser, and we also get a hint of who the first guest of the show will be!
Below is the much anticipated teaser of Dragula Season 3, the season in which our very first guest star competed for the title of The World’s Next Drag Super Monster!!
I’ll try to have that interview uploaded next week, but we’ll see how that goes lol. Editing this time around was literally the most brutal project I’ve probably ever done outside of college work. At one point I was awake for 29 hours and spontaneously passed out for a three hour nap, BUT practice makes perfect and we out here af! For future reference, just take “next week” as “next upload” because once I start working more eventually, things will get TOUGH.
Queer Camp Out – SMTX’s Queer Kiki
Queer Camp Out 1/24 – Will be here pretty damn fast on Friday, this party is going to be INSANE so I actually can’t wait! Checkout the event page for details on tickets. And hit me up on Instagram if you’re interested in competing in the runway or dancing categories!
Almost $200 over our initial goal, but like Miley Cyrus in her Bangerz Phase – We Can’t Stop
Further donations will be accepted until the end of January solely due to the fact that this is all uncharted territory, and while things are going great now, history has taught me that typically when it rains, it pours.
An important note: Any and all donations made between now and the end of the month will receive a shout out on episode number four. Until then, donations will be accepted through the Facebook Fundraiser Page and through Venmo/CashApp – @GregGoneWild
If you do decide to donate, please know your contribution will be cherished, used wisely, sparingly, and with the utmost frugality.
Production expenses are strictly limited to: Traveling expenses (gas mostly) Emergency equipment fund (recorder/camera breaks) Soundcloud/Domain registration
Divine Takes The Crown
One of my proudest moments of this episode is the official beginning of our Song of The Week segment where I highlight the music that drowns out the void (for me anyways)
In this episode, we paid credit where it was due and gave our rose to Divine- Love Reaction. The Blue Monday drums are addicting, the synthesizers are what initially get my blood pumping and it’s Divine’s raw vocals that take us into the disco anarchy that we never knew we needed. It is always the right time for Love Reaction.
This jam is also on Spotify- you’re welcome.
Divine is a Goddess, please look up more of her Disco music and consider checking out her amazing documentary on Netflix, I Am Divine. Not only was she a pop culture phenomenon, but she was an incredibly sweet and inspiring person. I’ll speak more about how big a role Divine played in my life in later episodes.
*References mentioned in the episode*
1. The Tea on Iran is that we tried to overthrow them in the 50’s AND maintain that hold until the 80’s where our puppet was overthrown through an Islamic Revolution (told you I consider myself a smart person)- hello attempted puppet state!
Thank you so much for your support and for listening! If you’d like to donate to the Fundraiser, please check it out and keep in mind that Venmo is more than welcome too! CashApp/Venmo – @GregGoneWild
As always, show ideas/topics and general love are accepted in my Dms ❤️😘🖤
Hi guys- Greggo here- before we get started, I want to give you a quick language warning- Yes, I’ll be speaking English, but if you’re at a place where kids are- you’ll have to excuse my French.
Thanks!
As 2019 comes to a close, I can’t help but raise a figurative glass to what may perhaps be the most pivotal year of my life thus far. I know some people get thrown into a sort whenever they hear about resolutions and everyone else’s growth;
and to that I say: bitch get over it.
In a way, that’s the main takeaway right there in bold.
Around the beginning of 2019 I left two jobs: One was figure modeling and the other was working as a bouncer at my local gay bar in order to pursue what I was expecting to be a very successful row in the field of car sales. The decision to leave both jobs wasn’t easy. I’d loved my home bar before it ever even opened (like literally messaged the manager asking if I could help build parts of it) and figure modeling at the time was one of the only outlets I had that made me feel like I could meditate on my development as a person and as an artist.
My first week selling cars was awesome, I got within the top 5 sellers of a 19 person team, and sold about 12 cars my first month, but unfortunately that streak didn’t last and neither did the enthusiasm for the job; there was a steep learning curve in it all that I didn’t really catch on to per se, and for whatever reason things didn’t work out.
I felt defeated. I spent so much of 2018 looking for a job that was even remotely close to what I went to school for and still came up short- After all, I had just graduated in May with a degree in electronic media broadcasting and even had awesome internships with notable institutions like Austin’s local NPR station, KUT, Texas Monthly, and even garnered various awards in my roles of producing promotion for the campus radio station, breaking news reporting when catastrophic flooding ripped through Central Texas in 2015, and the top prize in a competitive marketing workshop by Cox Media Group. Surely something even remotely close to broadcasting or even public relations would reveal itself to me.
Wrong. So so so wrong.
Most places were scams. And the ones that really piqued interest never gave me a call back- even after numerous emails, hyperlinked resumes, and coverletters were sent. Other places were more swift with their No’s. My favorite opportunities of them all had me come in for a second interview, only to break my heart a week or two after. So I eventually settled in to that car sales arena, only for my plans to fall apart once again.
But here’s where 2019’s magic came in: I persisted and survived.
About a week before I had started my job selling cars, I got into yoga. I figured I’d miss the stretching and meditation that modeling gave me. After the car gig didn’t work out, I got back into modeling but kept yoga as part of my weekly routine.
There’s a very special power that yoga can have on your body and on your mind if you manage to calm the external distractions that cloud your environment. It took a couple of tries but eventually I learned how to sit and stand on my own- in my own power, if you will. On a psychological note, I’ve learned in school about the power of neurons- which kind of act like cookies in the web browser of your brain. Every memory you have and even every action that your body takes creates the chance to either trace down those thought-cookies and re-download the feelings and memories that come with them, or there’s the chance to exercise overwriting them. One day I eventually fell so deep into meditation that I felt like I had confronted those deafening voices. The ones that made me toss and turn. The ones that told me I was worthless, that my dreams were futile, that I was not worthy of my own happiness. They screamed while I stretched; and in the brightness of the sun and in the beauty of the day I wept. But the most beautiful part of it all was that after my session was over- the things those voices were saying eventually disappeared altogether… because each stretch paired a physical obstacle with a mental obstacle, and so long as I never left the mat feeling stiff, I knew that I had worked those mental kinks out bit by bit, day by day. With each opportunity that came and went and with every new professional disappointment steeping in, I had more time to meditate. And the more I meditated, the more I realized the gradual silence of doubt that had me in paralysis before. I was unknowingly coming closer to this dream that I had planned on pursuing AFTER I had gotten a comfortable job- and you’re reading and listening to it right now.
Starting a podcast and a website where I get to discuss my existential angst, tell other people’s stories and share my creative energy was always the plan eventually, but the anxiety and societal pressure of what it takes to become a voice worthy of being listened to always tore at my heart and soul. To be an artist is to be vulnerable, and to share that vulnerability in a way that may very well be tossed into the cosmic funnel of cyber-sludge that is this digital landscape is an EXTREME vulnerability that made me toss and turn to the point of creative debilitation. Someone once told me in their own battle with artistic angst that one of the things they keep in mind is a constant reminder that “Nobody needs your art.” And for some reason, I thought that saying was made for me. So, I created excuses for myself like “I’m not good enough yet, I should practice more.” Anything to avoid confronting my artistic demons.
The loudest voice of all was telling me for years that I’d never have what it takes to go out on a limb and produce the very content that I wished I could hear, something that would recognize me in my glory and power and say “I see you, and I love you.” That very same voice that had been haunting me for years had suddenly stopped altogether. Eventually I mustered up the courage to begin looking back on past work, and for the first time in a long time, I thought of my growth, and of my potential and it made me smile.
It’s not always easy to get to that state of transcendence- especially as someone who has a crazy amount of anxiety, and an improving but nevertheless eternal battle with depression- but this hippy yoga bullshit has helped me- and now that I’ve found the power of my voice, it’s my time to tell you
I see you and I love you.
Thanks for keeping up. Can’t wait to see where we go. We’ll talk next week.
If you liked this episode, please give the Facebook page some love- share all the memes like all the posts, or if instagram and Twitter are more your thing- simply throw some hearts at me over at @GregGoneWild.
Thanks for your support, and best wishes on this Happiest of New Years!
